So Tired

I'm so tired of hiding what I feel, Especially when what I feel is real. I'm so tired of feeling fear, There is no need to fear when God is near. So tired of denying myself those things, Those things that joy will bring. Amidst life's tortured path There are but a few moments When smiles bring great joy I'm so tired of missing those moments. I'm so tired of trying to fake a smile, when I don't feel one, Needing only some concern, just to find out there is none. I'm so tired of not knowing what to do, Only to decide, then what I decide is what I shouldn't do. Heartfelt emotions from the left and right. Tears, exhilaration, and more night after night. So many changes all around, my brain is fired. All I can say, Lord, I'm so tired! So very tired!”